Ratt and Sia were right.
Every day is a gift. If you’re given the privilege of opening your eyes to see the yellowish-white ceiling with that ugly design that every ceiling in history has had, then you need to make the most of your day. Get a shower and start it off right. Eat breakfast, three eggs and a bagel, English muffin or toast, whatever you have available, and get dressed to take on the world.
The traffic to work isn’t bad because it could always be worse. Like the good little employee that you are, get to work five minutes early so that you’re sure you’re not going to be late. Then, when all is settled, take the first sip of life-giving coffee because it was too cold to drink up to this point.
The computer screen flashes and it begins. You’re back doing exactly what you had done the day before. You’re moving forward in time, but every day is a time machine to the day before, like a movie that’s on repeat. You’re moving forward in time, but every day is a time machine to the day before, like a movie that’s on repeat. Each day the coffee gets staler and the conversations with your coworkers get duller. Every morning that you come in, you’re closer to death, and no one is moving forward – just repeating the same day.
Time is the only thing passing, and I can see it in the people I talk to. The bags under their eyes droop more and the smile lines start to crack, ink pouring out because they’ve drawn on fake grins since they joined the world because of the archaic things you’ve been told by people who have already signed their lives away to time and don’t want it back. “Don’t tell people how you really feel. Just be good and do your job. Then, when it’s all said and done, you die, just like the rest of us.” That’s what they say. I’ll never know if they believe it or not, but I know that I’m expected to believe it too… and I can’t.
Why can’t I believe that the world is meant to be a place full of true emotion and happiness around every corner? Why am I told to keep pushing forward and accept my fate when the people that are telling me to push forward and be a puppet to those born before me are the same that didn’t see travesties happening all around them? Why does it feel like I’m the only one who sees that anytime someone gets hurt, whether it’s an impressionable, unsupervised boy at youth group or a government that can’t feed its people, that it’s totally avoidable?
I don’t think that the world and the people in it are stupid, but why does everyone just accept this new fucking way of life that’s only existed for like 200 years and has hurt so many people. This is the first time in history where people are starting to get access to medicine, emotional support groups, food, technological advancements and an infinite number of other positive things, but because of the outdated hierarchy in place and idiots with ancient principles at the top, we’re still going to destroy the planet with our greed and gluttony.
So why the fuck, do I have to get up every single day, and carve a smile into my face with a knife (because I’m not fake enough to use a pen. The ink fades too quickly.) Why do I crawl out of bed and get told to vote one hundred times a minute for candidates that have no moral standing to follow their goals once they win? Why does it seem like I have to wait until the people in charge of the system die to make a difference? It’s because everyone’s moving clockwise, which is just another way to say running in circles.